Exactly 13 years after I received it as a gift, I gave away my old coffee machine. It’s a bit slow but works just fine. The recipient was happy. I love my new one, too, but, somehow, I doubt I’ll be able to say the same again in 2038.
“Durable if maintained.” This used to apply to most things. A kettle. A cell phone. A car. But the more electronics mark the bulk of hardware components, the more fragile said hardware becomes. Short circuits, overheating, sure, there are more risks than with a few steel rods and joints—but in the end, it’s usually the software that gives way.
“Your firmware will no longer update.” A manufacturer-induced death is now one of the most common ways devices fail. It could be cheaper ingredients or increased complexity, but, often, it’s simply the producer saying, “You know what? It’s time for you to buy a new one.”
Aggressive consumerism is sad, but it’s even sadder that the same fragility has spilled over into our relationships. With digital connections, there are more options, and that optionality has increased the pressure to maximize the boundary of one’s social circle. If someone doesn’t text me every week, why not text with someone else? Because texting is not what the relationship is about—but that part quickly gets lost.
As we age, it gets even harder to put the same amount of social lubricant into our closest ties. But that was true for past generations just the same. They got married. They built houses. They had kids. And yet…durable if maintained. After all, strong materials don’t need constant checkups, do they? Once a year is more than enough.
There may be limits to how long you can preserve your modern-day gadgets, but just because maintenance might not work is no reason to not maintain at all. The same goes for your relationships. Don’t be so fussed about someone only piping up again after a year or two. Chances are, at some point, you might do the same. Be happy you heard from them, and trust in a simple belief: Even the things that aren’t things at all will stay durable as long as they are maintained.