Around the time I turned 18, I couldn’t wait to get contact lenses. My glasses had felt like a burden for a while. In terms of looks. In terms of quality of life. Even playing video games seemed cooler while wearing contact lenses.
For many years after that, I always made sure to put in contact lenses when I left the house. In some of those years, I probably spent weeks at a time wearing them for 12 hours a day. It took until my mid-20s that I started feeling less self-conscious about wearing glasses. But once I started working for myself, I had bigger fish to fry. I wasn’t trying to please the imaginary love of my life anymore—and hey, if she was going to appear, I felt sure she’d like me well enough with glasses. Like I said: less self-conscious!
Despite this, I always had a plan in the back of my hand: laser eye surgery. It always seemed like a good deal, but various eye doctors had told me I’d have to wait into my 20s for my eyes to fully grow out. You also couldn’t do it when your power wasn’t stable. And it was expensive, of course. Therefore, in 2020, I was thrilled to switch to a health insurance that would cover part of the surgery after I was with them for at least three years.
Well, those three years now passed three years ago, and I still haven’t gotten LASIK surgery. So, what’s up? Of course, different doctors tell you different stories. One said it was a good time to do it, and I’d get a lot out of it, including some health benefits in my case. Another said because of my eyes, they could only use a certain method, and that method might be more painful and take much longer to heal. And so on. So I kept going back and forth.
One day, however, I caught myself thinking: “Hmm, what glasses should I get after my surgery? I won’t need anything with power, so that’s neat. I could probably have multiple models, swap between them, and so on!” After a moment, I realized: “Wait a minute. You like wearing glasses? You intend to keep wearing them even when you no longer need to? When did this happen?”
You never know exactly, of course. When your mind subtly shifts from one position to another. You just one day happen to sit at the opposite end of the table—and if you’re lucky, you’ll notice you actually like it over there. Perhaps even more than you enjoyed the other side.
I’ve worn glasses for most of a quarter century. I’m a writer, intellectual, and Harry Potter fan. I believe glasses suit both me and my personality, and, at this point, I’d feel weird without them. So of course, the last thing I need is laser eye surgery—and I can count how many times I’ve worn contacts in the last 12 months on one hand.
You’re allowed to change on all time frames. From one minute to the next. Over the course of an intense six months. Or gradually, even glacially, as decade after decade goes by. One day you can’t wait to wear contacts, the next you’ll wear glasses all the time. And even when it takes years to go from A to B, it might feel as if there’s nothing but a moment between them. That, too, is life—and if there’s one thing I can see clearly now, it’s that it’s one of many aspects that make it beautiful.
