It’s part of being a good host: While you’re dealing with food and drinks, you get the guests to have fun without you. “Talk amongst yourselves,” we might say, and, usually, the conversation takes care of itself.
But what will the guests talk about? When I’m out for dinner with the boys from college, topics might revolve around the food, gaming, world events, and how the single guys are doing. During family gatherings, one side loves to talk about people from their town whose names I rarely recognize.
In many conversations, what’s happening in the lives of the people at the table comes up here and there but is often an afterthought. Perhaps sharing in a group feels uncomfortable, or no one wants to hijack the conversation.
But when I see my friends, which is not that often, I want to know what’s really going on. My grandparents are in their 80s. The number of future chats I’ll have with them is dwindling. I want to know what it was like growing up after the war. How did it feel to run a store in the 70s? What was their favorite vacation? I don’t always manage, but I try to ask more of these questions. The kind whose answers will last beyond the dinner.
“Talk about yourselves.” How’s that for an encouragement to kick of brunch or a round of beers? If everyone at a five-person table shares one big story from their lives, that should make for one hell of a memorable conversation. Let’s talk about the stuff that matters.
