For every one thing in life you can control, there are ten that you don’t. Therefore, learning to let go is more important than knowing how to hold on. Even once you are good at letting go, however, the speed with which you can do so also matters.
It’s great if you can forgive a big grudge after six months, but if you could forgive it after two, that might save your relationship altogether. For some challenges, letting go too late is the same as not letting go at all.
Yesterday, I got a speeding ticket. It was late at night. I was driving alone. I was tired. I wanted to overtake a lorry before a one-lane stretch, and bam, smile for the camera! “Awww, noooo, come on!” I said to myself. The realization that I could have overtaken the truck 500 meters later didn’t help either.
My speeding ticket was entirely unnecessary and 100% my fault—but I also knew something else: The environment I made my mistake in made it worth forgiving. Made me worth forgiving. I’d had one hell of a week, with little sleep, lots of travel, and plenty going on. I just wanted to go home and hit the hay. So I drove too fast and got a ticket.
I groaned two more times, then moved on. By the time I arrived at home, I wasn’t thinking about the ticket anymore. Free to go to bed, clear my head, and move on. That’s the power of letting go fast.
Stephen Covey’s son once wrote a book explaining that the more people trust each other within and between different businesses, the faster everyone can get things done. The speed of letting go has that same effect for the relationship between you and life itself.
When you step on a pebble, the rock no longer feels your presence as soon as your foot takes the next step. Your mind, however, can carry the pebble a long way—unless you decide not to. The sooner you can let the stones in your way float down the river of time, the smoother everything will flow.