The More You Talk, the More You’ll Say

That’s obvious. What inevitably leads to your foot ending up in your mouth at work, however, can be a boon in relationships.

When you talk a lot to someone, a lot of things will eventually come up — if only because you’re running out of things to say. Conversations take unpredictable twists and turns. Suddenly, you might find yourself discussing your need for better trash management organically, without having to make it a formal affair.

Increased communication reduces friction points because you end up addressing them before they flare up. It also offers more space to be vulnerable. If you and your spouse routinely talk a lot, it’s easier to more casually insert what’s actually a big item. Like small grievances getting some spotlight because everything else is already covered, big ones will become talking points because you’re already on their subject. “How was work today?” can turn into a full-blown discussion about your partner’s career trajectory any time it is needed — but only if you ask the question every day. That, too, reduces friction.

In any conversation, there’s a time to speak and a time to listen. With the people you care most about, however, there’s no point in being on guard: They’re not trying to attack you. So ramble away, hold nothing back, and encourage your loved ones to do the same. We don’t always realize the power of our words until they already hang in the air, but sometimes, that’s the very best thing about our ability to speak.